By Marissa Hayes (Whetstone Staff)
Marissa Hayes      Melissa Boyd / Whetstone
Congratulations!
When I was younger, I’d use that response after one of my friends has told me that they received a high grade on a test or a promotion at work.
Lately, I’ve been saying that to expecting mothers, who are all the same age or younger.
It makes me wonder, will I be next? I’m not saying that having a child is a bad thing. I just don’t see the rush at such a young age.
I have a friend my age who is pregnant.
She tells me all the time that she wants to have as many children as possible while her eggs are still working. She doesn’t want to wait “forever†to have children.
Would the wait really be forever? Twenty-one years flew by for us, so I’m pretty sure she could have waited a few more years if she wanted.
Maybe getting pregnant younger is better because the risk of miscarriages is lower.
In fact, the risk of a miscarriage is 10 percent for women under 25. I know that can be an issue when we grow older. However, that isn’t an excuse to have a baby so early if you’re not ready.
Another, more common reason to rush for a baby may be because some women don’t want to be an old mother.
A survey said 33 percent of women won’t have children after the age of 27 because they don’t want to be considered an “old†mother.
The survey was surprising, but I was even more surprised when my friends agreed with the survey. They explained how they don’t want their children to be made fun of because they have old parents.
In addition, are we financially ready?
It’s not the same as taking care of a puppy or kitten. Only if you’ve hit the lottery or married into money can I understand the rush to have a child.
But we’re still children ourselves, and children are more expensive than most people imagine. For instance, children’s expenses are estimated around $1,000 per month or $12,000-$13,000 per year.
Most importantly, do we understand the responsibility that comes with having a child?
No more going out, partying with friends, coming home when you want or anything. When we have children, we have to put our goals on the back burner and put them in the front.
Everyone knows someone who is not ready for parenthood.
We’re still trying to learn as much as we can to grow up. We’re still trying to figure out who we are and what we need to do.
Don’t get me wrong, there are a lot of people my age who are prepared for such a responsibility, and I highly applaud them for that. However, there are large handfuls that don’t have a clue on what they’re getting themselves into.
From financial reasons to personal reasons, some women are not as ready to have a baby as they thought.
Still, if someone told me that she was pregnant, I will say, “Congratulations.â€
