Ashly Bendorovich - photo by Kristen Griffith

Ashly Bendorovich – photo by Kristen Griffith

By Ashly Bendorovich (Whetstone Staff Writer)

It seems everyone needs to be labeled today.

In college, many students question their sexuality. They either have to be considered gay, straight, or bi.

This is a problem for me. Why can’t people just be considered people? I don’t categorize myself as anything. I’m a human being.

I was unsure if I liked men or women when growing up. In high school, I had boyfriends, but I always felt like something was missing until I had my first girlfriend during my sophomore year of college. After that, I thought I strictly liked women.

Since then, I’ve found myself interested in both sexes. At first, I was upset because I was unsure what to label myself. Was I a lesbian? Was I was bisexual?  I was wrapped up into trying to put myself into a category.

I watched some of my friends go through the same issues. Because everyone was asking those questions, I found myself asking the same ones.

After I had a conversation with my mother, everything started to make sense.

“You do not need to figure it out now,” she told me. “Why does it matter who you like? If they respect you and like you for you, a gender or label is not needed.”

She was right. Why did it matter what gender I liked or who I liked? If I was happy, why does it matter what I am?

People should not categorize people by sexuality because people get caught up in the idea of figuring out what to categorize themselves.

I was caught up in the pressure I felt from everyone telling me what I am.

I am not the only one who feels this way.

Now, I no longer get caught up in the pressure of letting other people try to define who I am.

I want students to recognize that being labeled is wrong.  Some students may not understand the type of pressure that can come from trying to label people.  There is already enough pressure on us to figure out who we are, so why increase the pressure?

Some students do not get the opportunity to have a great support system like I did. I was able to not hide that I liked both sexes. Some students have to hide this from their parents because they would not approve, so the extra pressure from other students can be damaging.

Students may be dealing with this struggle every day.  Some people need support, not another person telling them what they are.

There are just some things we cannot change. We can’t change who someone might be, but we can change how we treat them.